Cheery Upbeat Birthday Post
Does anyone read this, besides the one person I know well?? Leave a fuckin comment if you read this garbage.
Do you ever wake up and just wish you could stay in bed? FOREVER. Then do you wake up and write suicide notes in your head all morning while you shower and eat and get dressed and drive to work? Me. Neither.
I hate birthdays and I am especially inexcited about 25. So now I am 25 years old and I supposed I can have a quarter life crisis. I think I'm having it.
I had a shit day yesterday, well it was good at the start and great at the end, the middle however sucked so bad that I dont think I can salvage the day and say it was "good".
B is just kind of fading and I am so confident that he is not my type, he is however cute and smart so I'm somewhat conflicted. He is too affected and sadly I'm more then aware that I am so affected in general that I dont need to be and shouldnt be with anyone right now. I have to stick to friends and really avoid unfulfilling sex with people I barely know, I doubt I will totally abstain. I have already taken a huge cut in the amount of people I sleep with. Down 90% in the past few months.
Anonymous sex is so unfullfilling that I can hardly handle it at all. It drains me physically and mentally and I absolutely feel that I am regressing whenever I do it. It takes me down to a level of unhappiness that I really never want to visit. My cock does get the better of me sometimes though and I suppose one of these times I may pay for it.
Speaking with one of my closest friends yesterday I realized that I have never had sex with someone I loved, or never with someone I had a healthy loving relationship. I had sex with my boyfriend when I lived with him years ago and loved him in a way, but it was more like worry about him hurting himself love.
What would it be like to sleep with someone I was in love with I wonder, what would that be like? Jesus I cant even fathom it, I have a feeling this is very unfortunate. I mean I have slept with people that I loved but not in love with. WITH is the operative word. I mean we loved eachother and cared about eachother but we werent in love with eachother.
I'd like to fall in love this year.
Or else be dead by 26. . .because really whats the point?
Do you ever wake up and just wish you could stay in bed? FOREVER. Then do you wake up and write suicide notes in your head all morning while you shower and eat and get dressed and drive to work? Me. Neither.
I hate birthdays and I am especially inexcited about 25. So now I am 25 years old and I supposed I can have a quarter life crisis. I think I'm having it.
I had a shit day yesterday, well it was good at the start and great at the end, the middle however sucked so bad that I dont think I can salvage the day and say it was "good".
B is just kind of fading and I am so confident that he is not my type, he is however cute and smart so I'm somewhat conflicted. He is too affected and sadly I'm more then aware that I am so affected in general that I dont need to be and shouldnt be with anyone right now. I have to stick to friends and really avoid unfulfilling sex with people I barely know, I doubt I will totally abstain. I have already taken a huge cut in the amount of people I sleep with. Down 90% in the past few months.
Anonymous sex is so unfullfilling that I can hardly handle it at all. It drains me physically and mentally and I absolutely feel that I am regressing whenever I do it. It takes me down to a level of unhappiness that I really never want to visit. My cock does get the better of me sometimes though and I suppose one of these times I may pay for it.
Speaking with one of my closest friends yesterday I realized that I have never had sex with someone I loved, or never with someone I had a healthy loving relationship. I had sex with my boyfriend when I lived with him years ago and loved him in a way, but it was more like worry about him hurting himself love.
What would it be like to sleep with someone I was in love with I wonder, what would that be like? Jesus I cant even fathom it, I have a feeling this is very unfortunate. I mean I have slept with people that I loved but not in love with. WITH is the operative word. I mean we loved eachother and cared about eachother but we werent in love with eachother.
I'd like to fall in love this year.
Or else be dead by 26. . .because really whats the point?
posted by Fauxmosexual at 10:23 AM
2 Comments:
I am 8 weeks away from 26...exactly, from today, actually. I'll let you know how it is so you can plan accordingly, lol.
Anyway - SO GOOD to see you back, babe...missed reading. ;) Keep it coming and I'll keep reading. (Putting your link back up, too.)
hey catch me on AIM - StructureExpress or on Yahoo! - DoubleClick80 would love to chat! :)
Yeah...25. What a bitch that is...wait until 30 smacks you around like it's prison bitch. For real...I'm still trying to recover from that one.
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